Stupid celebrity soccer tattoos: a kiss on Messi’s abs, Gilardino’s Peppa Pig – Ghana latest soccer news, live scores, results
Last time around, we took a look at the ridiculous soccer tattoos fans made for a good laugh. Now, as promised, we are going to take a look at the questionable football star tattoo choices, some of them will blow your mind.
1. Lionel Messi
Do you know that feeling you get when you watch Lionel Messi play football?
The one where you are consumed with fear, worship and respect?
Looking at Lionel Messi tattoos doesn’t give you the same feeling. In fact, the body art of the world’s greatest player is now more likely to make you cringe.
Check out this: a new tattoo of his wife’s lips… near her groin.
Messi got his wife Antonella Rocuzzo’s lips tattooed on the lower part of his abs, just above his groin.
It is said to symbolize that he will always have his wife’s kiss with him wherever he goes.
Nice feeling, but still a questionable choice.
What do you think?
2. Alberto Moreno
Sometimes Moreno’s bespectacled monkey holding a gun is puzzling.
The tattoo on the thigh is an enigma of meaning and taste.
3. Andrés D’Alexandre
Some people get tattoos of their significant other, children, or even pets – but a tattoo of your own face is just weird.
Just in case his onlookers couldn’t look every two feet higher, the former Portsmouth man stuck his own mug to his chest.
Even though you are the most beautiful guy in the world, which he is not with all due respect to D’Alessandro, that is just plain wrong.
4. Alessandro Diamanti
A quick glance at Diamanti’s arms and you would think he was the king of an Italian prison.
Upon closer inspection, you will notice that her tattoos are the doodles of a teenage girl bored in double math.
Smiling faces, peace signs, pool balls, and random stars – it’s all fine on its own but not great together.
5. Damien Delaney
Clowns are scary. It is a scientific fact.
Clown tattoos really aren’t scary.
Delaney’s is certainly one of the worst.
6. Artur Boruc
Oh no, we were wrong that Delaney’s clown was one of the worst tattoos.
Former Bournemouth goalkeeper Boruc beats him with a monkey – the Pole’s navel being the back * ahem * of the cheeky mammal.
To be fair, we had a little chuckle about it, but that doesn’t mean it’s not bad.
7. Marco Materazzi
What catches the eye first in this photo are the wings on Materazzi’s back. They are actually pretty cool.
But look away slightly to the right and you see a stack of sneakers.
It just sounds like the idea of a poor sponsor.
7. Jay Bothroyd
Everyone is a famous former England international who has also performed in Thailand and Japan.
At first glance, it’s a horrible mix of guns, grenades, and knives.
In reality, it is much worse than that – because it spells out the world “love”.
No idea why he looks so smug in this shot.
8. Alberto Gilardino
We like to think of Champions League and World Cup winners as tattoos on top of the garbage.
But no, Italy, AC Milan, Fiorentina and a whole slew of other top Italian teams, the Gilardino man proves this idea wrong.
Worse yet, it’s a tat of a children’s television character.
Yes, you might have a daughter, and yes Peppa Pig is awesome, but that’s not acceptable.
9. Ricardo Quaresma
Everyone knows that teary tattoos mean either the number of people you’ve murdered or the loss of a family member or friend.
Quaresma has two. We hope it is for the second reason.
Either way, that brings us to rule three: no tattoos on the face.
10. Dele Alli
What better way to celebrate your rise to football greatness than with a tattoo?
Dele Alli obviously thinks so anyway, and he’s decided to mark his great season for Tottenham and England – as well as a second consecutive PFA Young Player of the Year award – by getting a tattoo.
What will you ask me with? Maybe a lion to celebrate his status as one of England’s best young players? Or something marking one of his big goals for Spurs? Or a children’s cartoon character that you had forgotten about?
11. Paul Di Canio
When Gilardino went to the tattoo parlor, he asked for a pig that Wikipedia says loves jumping in puddles.
When his fellow Italian Paolo Di Canio went to the tattoo parlor, he asked for Dux, referring to Benito Mussolini.
“I got a tattoo in 2000, in Bologna,” said Di Canio. “I was playing in England and I was recovering from an injury.
“For me, Mussolini represented the idea of a society with rules that everyone respects: love and patriotic pride.
12. Leroy Sané
A tattoo of yourself is bad.
A huge tattoo of yourself on the back is worse.
But a huge tattoo of yourself on the back celebrating a goal (against Monaco) that ultimately turned out to be useless as Manchester City were knocked out of Europe?
It is unforgivable.
The only logical place to start here is to recognize how sad it makes you.
It’s funny? No, this is not the case.
It’s not funny because Leroy Sane is so handsome. And not in the sense that, say, Andrea Pirlo is a handsome boy, is he? Oi Oi! Hide your daughters! We mean Leroy Sane might actually be, like, an angel.
Just a real angel, both cherub and male, come down from heaven to pick up big checks from the Middle East.
If you looked at Leroy Sane’s back and there was a small pair of white wings, you wouldn’t be so surprised. You could look twice, yes, but would you be surprised? No.
But Leroy Sane’s back, in reality, is just a shitty version of Leroy Sane’s front.
A massive, massive Leroy Sane on Leroy Sane’s back.
He even took inspiration from Mauricio Pinilla’s book by describing a moment – permanently, should we add – of a game in which he lost.
“This is also the pose in which I often celebrate my goals,” Sane said. “That’s why I chose this photo.”
I mean, after all that’s been said and done, think before you ink, guys.